i feel like i live in too many different realities...

I'm tired and scared.

My self at camp sent me a letter which I got, forwarded through my cabin leader, and my mom, and finally, to me today:

Dear Alex, Since I have to write this quickly I am going to talk about about what I've been feeling lately and why it is so important to hold on to that. "Happy" is the feeling, and not just happy, but grateful for, and in awe of, life. I think love is what did this to me. Right now I am blissfully in love with Cameron. This has changed me in so many ways, but it has also helped me bring forth things in me that were buried. Curiosity and mystery have been key components of my life, but seeing and sharing wonder with him has truly replenished my source of it. Forgiveness and patience were things I knew, but this relationship has tested them to their limits and revealed the beauty of being open to the ways of the world. Love. I have always believed in love, but trusting mystery and enduring the difficulty of forgiveness, I have been able to witness its true power. What I want you to remember is this: There is not enough time to do all I want to do, but there is time to do much, grow significantly, change the world. But you have to harness every moment. You have to say yes to things that are difficult and scary. You have to continue to love and forgive and live in the reality and mystery and wonder of what is, and believe in the possibility of what can be. And trust. Make it happen. Let it happen... I am out of time. These are snippets of my thoughts. A message to the future. Hope it helps <3 Alex