I will try to be powerful.
To not submit to these injustices.
To do something good, to make change.
I WILL try.

But I don't think I will ever be happy.

To quote myself: "I'm actually not sure if I believe that fear is enough to keep me alive (some days the 'dread of something after death' could not compete with the dread of life)."

Its so hard to be alive.
But there is no point to all the suffering if I am not stretching myself; if I am not doing everything in my power to allow that maybe someday it won't be this way for everyone else. And if nothing changes, then we will destroy ourselves, and good riddance. Maybe much more beautiful things will take our place in existence.