i have a lot to say, so I'm just gonna start typing.

my first thought is this:
it would be wonderful if people would listen to what I say, and believe me, or take me seriously.
that seems to be a theme over the happenings of the past few days.

this whole summer at camp... i have been healing. the minute i step away from neverneverland, all of that disappears. or maybe i wasn't healing at all... just temporarily escaping my real life.
i am thrust back into failed relationships, lost love, friendships that are more destructive than constructive, a world obsessed with/reliant on drugs and sex.



its amazing how long it took me to get from misery to happiness, and how short it took me to get back.

I'm still gonna try to be happy. I'm always gonna try.
But I really don't think the world is going to let me.


there are people in my room with me.
i need to stop.
i need to go.