jobs jobs jobs...
Zeeb from Camp K and Becca from Summer Winds have been emailing me about working this summer. wow... it feels like last summer just ended. I guess there is still a good chunk of time before those things start up again. I AM going to Peru for 10 weeks before then. Even so, I still feel like I am gonna need a longer break before being at Camp K all summer again, which is why I really hope I get the job in West Virginia at NYSC. Initial offers were supposed to be made on Saturday but I guess Andrew got delayed. That kinda sucks cause Zeeb wants to confirm my dates... now! What do I do? I think I am just gonna confirm dates for Killoqua that are after the science camp ends. That way I can accept a job offer from NYSC if that's the case, or if I am not hired by NYSC then I can stay in Honduras longer with my family, or come back here and work a session or two at Summer Winds before my time at Killoqua starts. That makes sense and I probably shouldn't keep Zebra waiting for my confirmation.

schoolllllllll.....
My final paper is due tomorrow. I don't feel too stressed out about it, I just know I have a lot of work to do and its going to be a massive time and energy commitment to make it the quality I want it to be.

I found out that my final presentation is a week from today. I am glad its not any later or I would be a wreck for even longer. I checked the clock today in class at 11:40 which is when I am supposed to present next week. It was a LONG period of time and I was on the way up to the Greenery by 11:55 when my presentation is supposed to end. Scary. At least I feel confident that I am actually going to do it. And I am trying wildly not to psych myself out like I did last year. It helps that I feel really confident in my paper and that I care deeply about the topic. I wish that somehow I could share my passion and learning about this topic with the class, without having to get up and talk in front of everyone. :/
Someone suggested I don't think about it as a presentation but as a way to share something really cool that I've been learning about. That is probably the only way I can think about it if I am going to get through this week without defenestrating myself. Hahahahahha
Its hard to get over the academic paradigm I've been raised in though, so a presentation, as it stands, is a presentation. Eventually I hope to get over that.

Paradigms in general are hard to break. This is something I've been thinking about, and I've been actively trying to see life in different ways... ways that involve complete shifts in understanding. I guess partially this is impossible. We are, in part, products of our environment... whatever that might mean disparately in different situations. Paradigms "have little meaning without the cognitive presuppositions that go with them" to paraphrase Jorge Ishizawa in Cosmovisions.


meh...
done writing.